Don't Let the Stumble Stop You: How to Process Setbacks and Get Back on Track

Hey there!

As a high-performance coach, I see firsthand how setbacks can be a real gut punch. It’s a completely natural part of the journey toward any big goal, but that doesn't make it any easier when you're in the middle of it. When you’re putting everything you’ve got into something, a setback can feel like a total roadblock, not just a bump in the road.

The truth is, feeling like it's hard is totally valid. It's okay to feel disappointed, frustrated, or even a little defeated. That's a sign that you care deeply about your goals. But to get back on track, you've got to process those emotions in a healthy way. Shoving them down only makes them bubble up later, often at the worst possible time.

So, how do you handle the emotional mess and start moving forward again?

1. Give Yourself a Moment to Feel It

First things first: don't immediately try to "fix it." Acknowledge the emotions you're feeling. Give yourself permission to be bummed out, mad, or whatever emotion is coming up. You don’t have to let it consume you, but acknowledge it. Tell yourself, "This sucks, and I'm feeling really frustrated right now." This simple act of recognition can be surprisingly powerful. It’s like a quick mental reset before you dive into problem-solving mode.

2. Get Some Perspective 

Once you’ve had a moment to breathe, it's time to zoom out. Look at the setback for what it is: an event, not your entire identity or a final verdict. Ask yourself some questions:

• Is this a temporary situation or a permanent one? Most setbacks are temporary.

• What can I actually learn from this? There's almost always a lesson hiding in there. Maybe it's a new strategy, a flaw in your plan, or a blind spot you didn't know you had.

• What's one small thing I can do right now to move forward? Don't try to solve the whole problem at once. Focus on the very next step.

This kind of re-framing shifts your mindset from "Why me?" to "What now?"

3. Talk It Out (With the Right People)

You don’t have to go through this alone. Reach out to a mentor, a coach, or a trusted friend who understands your goals. The key is to find someone who will listen without judgment and help you think through the situation. A great sounding board can provide a fresh perspective and help you see solutions you might have missed when you were too close to the problem.

4. Adjust, Don't Abandon

A setback is a signal that your plan might need an update, not that your goal is impossible. It’s an invitation to be flexible. This is where high-performers really shine—they pivot instead of quitting.

Take what you've learned and build it into your new strategy. Maybe you need to dedicate more time to a certain skill, find new resources, or simply try a different approach. Your end goal remains the same; the path just got a little more interesting.

5. Start Small to Build Momentum

The hardest part of getting back on track is often taking that first step. Don’t wait until you feel 100% motivated. Focus on a single, easy-to-achieve task. This could be as simple as an email, a phone call, or 15 minutes of dedicated work on your project. Finishing that one small thing creates a feeling of accomplishment and starts to build the momentum you need to get rolling again.

Ultimately, every successful person you look up to has a story about a massive setback. The difference isn't that they never failed; it’s that they didn’t let those moments define them. They processed the emotion, learned the lesson, and got back in the game. You're more than capable of doing the same. Let's get back to it!